Thirteen ways Trick-or-treating is better than sex:

1. You are guaranteed a little in the sack.
.

2. If you get tired you can wait ten minutes and go at it again.
.

3. Uglier you look the easier it is to get some.
.

4. You don’t have to compliment the person who gave you some.
.

5. You’re guaranteed to get something sweet at the end of the night.
.

6. It okay when the other person fantasias that you are someone else, because you are.

7. 20 years from now you’ll still like candy.
.

8. It’s okay if your spouse knows you’re doing it with others.
.

9. If you don’t like what you get, you can go next door.
.

10. You can do it in a group.
.

11. It doesn’t matter if your kids hear you moaning and groaning.
.

12. Less guilt the morning after.
.

13. You can do the whole neighborhood.

Thirteen scary things from horror movies.

1. Werewolves

2. Vampires

3. Zombies

4. Ghosts

5. Ghouls

6. Flesh eating anything

7. Living brains

8. Headless horsemen

9. Over sized lizards

10. Living Dinosaurs

11. Giant squids

12. Aliens

13. Lots of small things we can’t really see too well in the dark; ie vampire bats, piranhas, critters of all types with sharp teeth that want to bite you or eat you. That what really gives me the creeps.

Writers like me sometimes add horror or suspense elements into their Romance story line. And in honor of Halloween, which is just around the corner, here are thirteen nerve racking descriptions off the top of my head.

1. The wind howled.

2. The hair on the back of her neck stood on end.

3. A chill went down her back.

4. Footsteps echoed in the dusty hallway.

5. A door squeaked loudly.

6. Not for the first time did she regret letting her boyfriend talk her into going to the cemetery at midnight.

7. Just for a moment his eyes glowed yellow.

8. It was pitch black in the house. She flipped on the light, and it didn’t come on.

9. Then she heard a loud noise, and she knew no one was home at this hour.

10. A loud screech made her jump.

11. Lightning crackled over the old empty house, and just briefly lit a face in the window.

12. Her sight finally adjusted to the dim light, and focused on a pair of eyes
staring back at her.

13. Behind her something scuttled across the floor, she spun around but saw nothing.

Halloween: as my daughter drapes my house in its Halloween splendor, I thought what really says Halloween?
1. Jack-o-lanterns?

2. Scarecrows?
3. Black cats?

4. Fake webbing?

5. Little bitty chocolate bars?

6. Horror movies?
7. Costumes?

8. Sculls?

9. The colors black and orange?

10. Ghosts?

11. Bowls and bags filled with cheep candy?

12. The smell of warm (or burning) pumpkins mixed with candle wax on

Halloween night?

13. Little kids screaming tick-or-treat!
What says Halloween to you?

Since its October first or nearly at this posting, here are thirteen things for October in no particular order.

I would have posted some photos but my internet service is acting funny.

1. Setting out the autumn decorations.

2. Getting out and decorating for Halloween. It’s not the same decorations as the autumn ones.

3. Raking fall leaves. I really hate this chore. We have sycamore trees, they have big leaves. Lots and lots of them.

4. Dusting the house and getting it ready, so I can shut all the windows for the cold season.

5. Picking out a pumpkin. I don’t do this quite so much now that my daughter is older.

6. Pulling out the spent spring flowers and planting fall bulbs or more mums.

7. Cleaning out my planters and planting some fall flowers.

8. Putting away all the shorts and summer clothes. Then digging out of the back of my closet for my long sleeve blouses and long pants. Cool weather clothes, oh how I miss thee.

9. Costume making time. My daughter has taken over this chore. She’s too old for trick-or-treating, but there’s an Ani-jam on Halloween that’s she’ll be attending. She won third place in the last one for her costume she had made.

10. Buying Halloween candy. We don’t get trick-or-treaters, we live too far out of town but I buy them for my small family. We like candy.

11. This year it’s on us for my daughter’s senior year school picture. It all has to be done by October 15th.

12. Get sign up for the Nanowritmo (National Novel Writer’s Month). It’s always a crazy month for me, but for the last three years I have finished in time with a 50,000 word novel.

13. Celebrate my hubby’s Birthday. His B-day is on the 29th.

Thirteen colors of Fall.

.
1. Grass-Green

.
2. Light green of faded sycamore leaves.

.
3. Olive green of dry leaves.

.
4. Red of maple leaves.
.

5. Gold of a fully mature Sunflower just ready to pick.
.

6. Burgundy of mock cherry leaves.
.

7. Light Brown of baked earth after the harvest.
.

8. Dark brown of the earth when the first rains come.
.

9. Tan of dried corn husks.
.

10. Dried Wheat Yellow.
.

11. Pumpkin-Orange.
.

12. Deep Orange-red of fall decorations.
.

13. With October just around the corner what is fall without Halloween-black?

Thirteen Animals that we’ve seen around our country home:

1. Mice. The darn things keep getting into the house.

2. Rats. That’s something you don’t want to see in the house, but they’ve been here living in the walls and attic.

.

3. Possums. Don’t let anyone fool you these guys are ugly they look like big rats, as far as I’m concerned they are marsupial rats. And they’ve been eating the cats food, bit our chickens on the leg which killed the poor chicken from an infection later. Ugh, I hate possums. Two young ones somehow got into the house too. Scared me half to death.
.

4. Coyotes. We hear their eerie cries almost every night. They’ve eaten my chickens, ducks and my cats too believe it or not.

5. Ring tailed cat. I saw one on the porch eating the cat’s food. It tore off when I turned the light on and looked out. They’re ingenious to California and it’s rare to see one. And here I had one eating on my front porch.

.

6. Raccoon. I saw one dead by the side of the road. Sad.

.

7. Skunk. They too like the taste of our cat’s food. I hate when one gets into the habit of visiting our house, they smell up the house something awful. Frabreeze can only do so much.

.

8. Peacock. A few years ago I heard a weird call and went outside, and there it was a male peacock with beautiful plumage. It took one look at me and ran back into the vineyard that used to be here.

.

9. Boar. It was a white male pig. Big sucker but lean like it wasn’t being fed much. It was running around slurping up the grapes that my landlord was paying to have laid out to turn into raisins back when there were raisin grapes here. My landlord even asked me if the damn thing was mine. Nope. I’m not sure what happened to it, but it disappeared.

10. Goat. I was coming home after I had dropped off my daughter at school and thought I saw a dog with a gummy sack on it head. I stopped the car and got out, but it turned out to be a male goat that had pulled out his chain. It took one look at me and ran hell bent for home. Gee, I sure scare the animals don’t I?

.

11. Pheasant. There use to be a lot that ran around here making an odd coughing sound, but I don’t see them very much anymore.

12. Horned and Barn Owl. The barn owl nests on our pine tree out front and I’ve seen the horned owl roosting on a telephone pole dawn or dusk. I hear them screech or who. One was trying to catch a rat and kept flying into my daughter’s bedroom window. She said, she didn’t get much sleep that night because of the crazy owl and the rat.

.

13. Hawk. There are a lot of birds of prey both small and large that hunt around here. One time when I was taking a bike ride I heard a hawk scream and I look up in time to see it dive on it prey. Last year while I was taking my daughter home from school we saw one flying with a snake gripped in its talon.

Thirteen famous movie quotes, the funny ones of course.
And in no particular order:

1. Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
If I’m not back in five minutes… wait longer!

2. Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
Lois: How would you like me to make your life a living hell?
Ace Ventura: Well, I’m not really ready for a relationship, Lois, but thank you for asking. Hey, maybe I’ll give you a call sometime. Your number’s still 911? All righty then.

3. The Addams Family:
Pugsley: We’re not shy!
Wednesday: We’re contagious.

4. Addams Family Values:
(Gomez refers to the girl popping out of the cake at a bachelor party)
Was she in there before you baked it?

5. Addams Family Values:
Gomez: Children, why do you hate the baby?
Pugsley: We don’t hate him. We just wanna play with him.
Wednesday: Especially his head.

6. Addams Family Values:
Little Girl: …and then Mommy kissed Daddy, and the angel told the stork, and the stork flew down from heaven, and put the diamond in the cabbage patch, and the diamond turned into a baby!
Pugsley: Our parents are having a baby too.
Wednesday: They had sex.

7. Airplane:
There’s no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you’ll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?

8. Animal Crackers:
Spaulding: (to two ladies) Let’s get married!
Mrs. Rittenhouse: The three of us? Why, that’s bigamy!
Spaulding: Yes! And it’s big of me, too!

9. Arthur:
I’m so rich, I wish I had a dime for every dime I have.

10. Gun:

“Your ego is writing checks your body can’t cash”, Captain Tom “Stinger” Jordan (James Tolkan)

11. The Empire Strikes Back:

“I’d rather kiss a wookie”, Princess Leia (Carrie Fisher)

12. Crocodile Dundee :

“You call that a knife? That’s not a knife. This is a knife”, Michael “Crocodile” Dundee (Paul Hogan)

13. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off:

“You can’t respect someone who kisses your ass. I just doesn’t work”, Ferris Bueller (Mathew Broderick)

The nation marks the end of a historic era in American politics and an unprecedented family dynasty. Sen. Edward Kennedy is dead at the age of 77.

Kennedy battled a malignant brain tumor, diagnosed in May 2008, which limited his appearances in the Senate. He survived longer than doctors first predicted. He died on August 25, 2009, at his home in Hyannis Port, Massachusetts.

The following is from Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.

1. Kennedy was born at St. Margaret’s Hospital in the Dorchester section of Boston, Massachusetts, the youngest of nine children of Joseph P. Kennedy, Sr. and Rose Fitzgerald. His elder siblings include John F. Kennedy, Robert F. Kennedy, and Eunice Kennedy Shriver.

2. An early political and personal influence was his affable maternal grandfather, John “Honey Fitz” Fitzgerald, a former mayor of Boston and U.S. Representative.

3. Kennedy spent his four high school years at Milton Academy prep school, where his grades were ordinary and he did well at football. He graduated in 1950.

4. Kennedy entered Harvard College, and in his spring semester was assigned to the athlete-oriented Winthrop House, where his brothers had also lived.

5. Kennedy enrolled in the University of Virginia School of Law in 1956, and also attended the Hague Academy of International Law during 1958. Kennedy graduated from law school in 1959.

6. While still in law school, Kennedy met Virginia Joan Bennett, known as Joan, while delivering a speech at Manhattanville College in October 1957. They were married by Francis Cardinal Spellman on November 29, 1958. They had three children together: Kara Anne (born February 27, 1960), Edward Jr. (born September 26, 1961), and Patrick (born July 14, 1967).

7. Kennedy was admitted to the Massachusetts Bar in 1959.

8. Kennedy was sworn in to the Senate on November 7, 1962.

9. On November 22, 1963, while presiding over the Senate, an aide rushed in to tell him that his brother, President John F. Kennedy, had been shot; his brother Robert soon told him that the president was dead. Ted flew to the family home in Hyannis Port, Massachusetts, to tell his stroke-afflicted father the news.

10. On June 19, 1964, Kennedy was a passenger in a private Aero Commander 680 from Washington to Massachusetts that crashed on final approach into an apple orchard in bad weather, in the western Massachusetts town of Southampton. The pilot and Edward Moss, one of Kennedy’s aides, were killed. Kennedy was pulled from the wreckage by fellow Senator Birch E. Bayh II and spent months in hospital recovering from a severe back injury, a punctured lung, broken ribs and internal bleeding. He suffered chronic back pain from the landing for the rest of his life. The hospital experience triggered his lifelong interest in the provision of health care services.

11. After his brothers’ deaths, Ted Kennedy took on the role of surrogate father for their 13 children. By some reports, he also negotiated the October 1968 marital contract between Jacqueline Kennedy and Aristotle Onassis.

12. Kennedy gave an endorsement to Obama on January 28, 2008. In a move that was seen as a symbolic passing of the torch, Kennedy said that it was “time again for a new generation of leadership,” and compared Obama’s ability to inspire with that of his fallen brothers. In return Kennedy gained a commitment from Obama to make universal health care a top priority of his administration if elected.

13. At the time of his death, he was the second most senior member of the Senate, and the third-longest-serving senator in U.S. history. He was best known as one of the most outspoken and effective Senate proponents of progressive causes and bills. For many years the most prominent living member of the Kennedy family, he was the youngest brother of President John F. Kennedy and Senator Robert F. Kennedy, both victims of assassinations, and the father of Congressman Patrick J. Kennedy.

Here we go again! It back to school. Our daughter’s school starts next week.
Thirteen things we have to get for back to school.

1. New Clothes, ya got to have new clothes when you go back to school. Can’t be seen in the old stuff from last year. If your child can fit in them anyway.

2. New shoes. I don’t know any child that does not go through several pairs a year.

3. New Backpack. Can’t use the old one from last year, if you can find it.

4. New binder.

5. New folders.

6. New lined papers to fill up the binders and folders.

7. New pencils. My daughter likes the mechanical pencils.

8. New pens. I wasn’t allowed to use them, but some the classes say they need them.

9. New color pens or pencils.

10. Calculator. I didn’t get to use one when I went to school, but I guess some things have changed.

11. New gym clothes for P.E.

12. New cell phone or at least repair the old one. This is the second time we’re going in to have her old phone repaired. And yeah, I didn’t have one of these either when I was a kid.

13. Lunch money! Can’t forget that or the daughter won’t forgive me.